The honest account, not the softened one. You cannot change what you are not willing to see.
Before we build anything, you look clearly at where you actually are.
This is the foundation the rest of the work sits on. It is twelve questions about the year you just had, and it is deliberately uncomfortable in places. That is the exercise working, not you answering wrong.
Do it alone, when you won't be interrupted. Nobody reads this but you and me.
12 questionsSaves as you goCompletely private
Before you start
How to answer this well
Most of what makes this work is in how you answer, not what you answer. Five things worth knowing before question one.
01Don't prepare.The first answer that arrives is usually the honest one. If you sit and construct a response, you'll get the version you've already told other people.
02Write the account you'd give a close friend.Not the one you'd give your mother, or someone who asked how things are going at a dinner. The one you'd give at the end of a long day when you've stopped performing.
03Messy is better than tidy.No need to organize or polish. Half-formed is fine. "I don't know, but maybe…" is a real answer and often the most useful one.
04Some of these won't come easily.If you find yourself sitting with a question for a while, that's not you misunderstanding it. A few of them are designed to take a minute.
05The comfortable answer is the one to watch.Every question here has a true answer and an easier one. The easier one will feel like protection. It isn't.
Your answers save automatically on this device as you type, so you can close the tab and come back. They are only sent to me when you finish.
Phase one complete
That's the hard part done.
Most people never write any of that down. You just did.
I'll read it properly and come back to you. The next phase picks up exactly here: you've seen where you are and what you're done tolerating. Next we decide who you're becoming, and build the structure to get you there.